Day 110

My freelance job is still easy. Work should be always be easy. Thinking hard all day is tres overrated. 

Day 109

I'm the new girl. Again. You'd think after being the new girl 4 times in one year (and counting!) that I would grow immune to it, but no. It's still awkward and the simplest things (like finding the bathroom or reading a brief) seem so overwhelming. Even though I know full and well that the feeling will pass, it still makes me want to say I have to use the restroom then climb out the window. 

At the same time, I would try a new job every week if I could. The first day at a new job is like the first day of school. Who's going to be in my class? Will there be any cute boys? What am I going to be learning? Who am I going to sit next to? 

Yes I sat in a cube that had pictures of cats all over it. Yes the girl who trained me bore an uncanny resemblance to Napolean Dynamite (and that's if I'm being polite). Yes I was hired as a writer and no, I would not call what I am doing writing. But it's temporary, and it pays more than all my jobs put together almost. And it's easy so I can save my "brain" power for more important things. 

So I'll take it and I'll like it. Until I don't. And then I will move on to something new. And add another line on my list of half-baked talents.

Day 108

Writer's block. Everything block. I just feel like dancing.

Day 107

Just finished with all the e-mail concepts and copy for Boston's bike program thing. I think I'm about done working for free. 

Started on a postcard campaign for the wine shop.

Accepted a full-time freelance position starting Monday at a .com that sounds like it could suck, but pays money. And money will get me a European adventure this year. 

Rearranged my entire apartment. Because rearranging my life is not enough. 

Forgot to buy lemons. 

Mad at iTunes for not letting me buy this song:

Day 106

Closed wine shop = MJ dance party + Petit Chablis

Day 105

Painted with Myriem all day. 

Day 104

Reading, reading, reading. 

And kicking myself for not asking the dreamboat winemaker that stopped in the store if I could pop in the next time I'm in Tuscany (It's okay, I have his card!). I was rendered speechless. The accent, the green eyes, the pictures of the castle he brought with him. The shoes, the hair, the olive skin. The accent!!! Mama mia. 

Day 103

Uh huh. I'm listening.



I'm only a couple chapters in and I sort of feel like I'm being brainwashed. But it also sort of makes sense. Get to the point Ferriss, I ain't got all day! 

Day 102

Yeah I can't work under these conditions.

Day 101

Why am I watching Rocky Balboa?

And liking it.

Day 100

Denied. For now. I will still stalk their web site for openings regularly.

Hi Stephanie,

Thanks so much for your follow up email and for your enthusiasm for the work we do. It’s the kind of passion we look for in candidates! While there’s no doubt you have some great experience and I’d love to keep in touch, there are a few things that prevent me from being able to offer some kind of assessment test to get you in the door right now. We’re not bringing junior level candidates right now as we need the gravitas someone with around 10 years experience offers to our clients. We also invest quite a lot in training up our newbies and getting them to a place where they can be on their feet with clients. Typically this takes a bit more time and mentoring for candidates who aren’t senior level and we’re not equipped to make that kind of investment given that our focus is on attaining new business. Given our capabilities and focus are elsewhere right now, I definitely maintain the interest in keeping in touch and reaching out to you when we’re able to make something happen on the interview front. 

Day 99

Maid-of-Honor-ing...

  

Day 98

The most perfect (real) job for me in the world (at the moment) sent me an email saying I don't have enough skillz for the position. It's true I don't have many actual skills, but I have accumulated a lot of bits and pieces of skills and this is the one job that sounded like it was made for someone with lots of bits and pieces! And I want it, dammit! So I wrote back and told her that. I told her to give me an assignment and allow me to prove myself (or totally blow it). She hasn't written me back yet.

Stephanie,

Thanks so much for sending us your resume and for your interest in the
training consultant role.

We've looked over your resume in detail and while you have some interesting
experience, it is not a match to the skills that we are seeking for the team
at this time.

Typically we look for a strong base in insight, new product, packaged goods
and brand development experience across several industries.  In addition, we
look for a minimum of 5 to 7 years of experience in these fields.

That said, we'd love to hold on to your resume should a position become
available that we see is a better match to the skills you offer.  In
addition, I'd encourage you to keep in touch as your experiences continue to
progress.

Day 97

Headhunter called about a freelance gig for some bank. Can't do it. It's too soon. And that sounds too horrible. 

Day 96

I wish every day was Tuesday.

Day 95

I cooked all day. My sister got some new underwear. That's fair.

Day 94

Ooo

Ahh

Aww

:)

WHOA!

Day 93

Planning an anti-bachelorette bachelorette party for my baby sister. Wine and cheese and chocolate, OH MY!

Day 92

3 months later, March 12, 2009 is still the best day ever. 

Day 91

A couple months back I read an article about how Boston was in the midst of attempting to launch a bike-sharing initiative similar Paris'. It sounded interesting so I wrote and asked how I could get involved. I have a 4th job now. It doesn't pay (UH...). I have to write e-newsletters (BLAH!). And it's not even about the bike-sharing project (HUH?).

Wow I'm a sucker.

Day 90

Before yesterday, I was adamant about finding a way to work fun part-time jobs full-time, forever. But this job sounds like it was made for meee. I must have this job. 

So what kind of person are we looking for?

You believe in and are passionate about innovation and creativity - your own and other people's. You know it makes a difference and where it can take you.

You have lots of business and brand experience, so you'll understand the needs of people from a wide range of different businesses and what they are trying to gain from our courses.

You engage with others, you're full of energy, you're easy to listen to, our clients will feel inspired by you. You will ensure they have an amazing experience every time they work with you. You will also be a great team player.

You will be at ease in front of an audience of any size as well as feeling comfortable presenting in front of a board of directors. You'll have the gravitas and presence to hold and engage with your audience.

You will be happy to live out of a suitcase, stay in loads of hotels and meet new people all the time from all over the world- it'll give you a buzz.

So I spent all morning and part of the afternoon writing a shiny new resume and carefully crafting my answers to the questions they ask during the application process. It says they aren't hiring right now BUT lists their open positions. So this might be all for nothing.....or not!

Day 89

I found another dream job. I knew it when I saw this question on the application:

If I was on a 12 hour flight with you what would I love about you? And what would irritate me?

(and when I saw the words NYC and travel all over the world in the job description.)

Day 88, PM

Turning places not worth caring about into places worth caring about. Yes, please! James Howard Kunstle is spot on. Suburbs are turning into some of the most depressing places on earth. There is no sense of community. No common good. Nothing worth preserving.

Once again, Ray Oldenburg, author of The Good Great Place (my favorite book ever) said it best.

"In the absence of an informal public life, Americans are denied those means of relieving stress that serve other cultures so effectively…our urban environment is like an engine that runs hot because it was designed without a cooling system."

Day 88

I just started writing a movie. I have no idea what I'm doing. 

Day 87

"Living well is the best revenge."

George Herbert

(1593-1633)

Day 86

Getting things done. In no particular order. 

Day 85

I wonder what other jobs there are around here that I would like. I'm not done with wine or ESL, I'm just feeling greedy. I want more fun jobs. 

Day 84

I haven't procrastinated all day! I think I like working from the Boston Public library. I think it's because of these lamps. I want one.   

Met with the Brazilian anthropologist this AM to help her with her conversation. Probably one of the most interesting people I've ever met. We will hang out twice a week to practice speaking. I told her I need a career which pays me to live in other countries and play with foreigners all day. She's on it. She said her Brazilian diplomat husband may have some ideas. I don't know if I could really just pick up and move but I REALLY like entertaining the idea.

Day 83

Lunch with my people. Then more procrastinating...It's not my fault. It's cloudy out with a chance of showers. I have no choice but to curl up on my couch and watch a moooovie. 

Day 82

No class today! But a lot of work to do. A lot of work that I'm probably going to wait until tomorrow to do. Because I'm beat.

Day 81

On my way back to Boston. On a bus. With wifi. With an upstairs. With people who aren't scary. For 18 bucks. 18! One eight!

Day 80

 I love New York.

Day 79

Exactly one year ago I moved to Boston.

I don't sleep on the floor anymore and it's finally starting to feel like home. 

Day 78

Last day of classes for a bit. New friends for the summer, and very possible much longer. 

Day 77

Today I was the student!

Day 76

What are some things you find annoying?

Japan: I don't like that my husband has always said "I'll wash the dishes later". I'm annoyed that even though I call a plumber, he hasn't always kept his promises. I don't like that the server explains about foods for a long time at the restaurants. I don't like winter in Boston. 

Day 75

I wasn't completely overwhelmed and confused in French class today. Until I lied and said I had a dog when it was my turn to tell something about myself because "dog" is the only word I remembered how to pronounce from the vocabulary. Then they asked me what his name is. Uhh, Spot! Then they asked what kind of dog he is. I don't know what kinds of dogs there are, lady!! You just called on me first and I didn't have time to think and now I'm caught in a web of lies! I don't even like dogs! Move on!

I will read the vocabulary this week. 

Day 74

Today is Memorial Day. Which reminds me that I really need to make friends with rooftops and BBQ grills. Instead of eating a delicious hamburger and corn on the cob, I helped my new boss paint her new apartment. Another job that I will NEVER attempt: Painting. The house kind. 

The good news for her room: Even a bad paint job would be an improvement.

   

Day 73

Wow I get SO much more work done when it's raining. More rain. More rain. More rain. 

Day 72

One of my students offered me her apartment in Paris. Whenever I want. For free. So I'm googling things. 

Day 71

They let ME help the wine rainman Matteo do the Friday tasting. Only because we were two men down. And they had no other choice. And I talk loud anyway. I liked it. I think I like talking in front of people.

Day 70

 International relations.  

Day 69

Hot is my favorite.
Dresses are my favorite.
Starting my day with foreigners is my favorite.
Making students who come in late sing a song in their language in front of the class is my favorite.

Writing on my stoop while crazy dogwalkers and mommies with babies in strollers and mailmen and neighbors and streetcleaners pass by is my favorite.
Walking around the city in the middle of the day in the middle of the week is my favorite.
Trying new cheese at the the European Food Festival with my students is my favorite.
Sleeping with my windows open is my favorite. 
Not going to an office to make advertising tomorrow is my favorite. 

Today is my favorite. 

Day 68

Working on my stoop. In the sunshine. On my brick-paved, tree-lined street. People are out walking around. Smiling. Saying hello to each other. I live on Sesame Street!

Day 67

It’s L’Auberge Boston.

My wine shop boss broke up with her boyfriend and moved out of his house and into a non-residential apartment in Chinatown today with some English and Australian artists and musicians. Yeah I think I’ve seen this movie before, too. AND I LOVED IT.

This is all more than slightly reminiscent of one of my favorite movies, L'Auberge Espagnole (The Spanish Apartment). Also one of my favorite types of movies. With different people from different places whose lives intersect. Why I’m fascinated by such things I don’t know but I am. So having a front row seat to a real life “Spanish Apartment”? I’m beside myself.

Their place looks like a condemned building at the moment but their collaborative creativity is already starting to add warmth and charm to it. There’s even graffiti inside! Graffiti and exposed brick and foreigners and artists and musicians. OH MY! My grand tour of the place was accompanied by the sound of Alessandro’s girlfriend practicing the cello. Their other roommate is a songwriter who has produced a song for John Mayer. The other roommate is an artist working on some instillation in Miami with artists from around the world. And I guess the whole building is filled with more of their kind.

I've found my new Third Place.

Also had the funnest, most un-filling lunch ever with my students after class. We went to a Japanese restaurant called something that meant soup meat fondue. We cooked soup right at our tables and added all sorts of interesting things to it. I did NOT eat the crazy egg inside. The crazy purple gel thing. I didn’t really eat much of anything. But it was fun to make. And again, amazing company. Where have these people been all my life?

Day 66

So it's not raining anymore but I wish it still was. So that I wouldn't feel guilty for staying in all day. I just can't seem to put clothes on. Even though I really need milk. Even though I'll be mad at myself tonight for wasting the day. I don't care. My apartment is too cozy right now. And the Coco Chanel movie I want to go see is still not out yet! So f it. I'm staying right here.

I'm fascinated by The Coco. I read a little about her life while writing a business plan for the jewelry company I freelance for. She's a badass! I remember reading a quote from her...something along the lines of "I didn't like my life so I reinvented it." Which I LOVED of course. Now her initials hang over the arms of desperate housewives and block UV rays from yuppie eyeballs everywhere. And how many little black dresses do we all own?? Not bad for a poor little orphan.

More Coco-isms:

“There are people who have money and people who are rich.”
~Coco Chanel

I invented my life by taking for granted that everything I did not
like would have an opposite, which I would like.
~Coco Chanel

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.
~Coco Chanel

Day 65

I had a very language-y day. I corrected English. 

France (I think I have a favorite student): I can be easily annoyed. But I will just discuss some of my new discoveries in Boston. I've been disappointed by the attitude of drivers in Boston. I don't drive but bike and walk a lot and in both situations, I've found that the drivers are really without respect for others. For example, at the red lamp, they don't stop before the pedestrian crossing, but on this one! Why? The drivers make also an extensive use of their horns and not always for some good reasons. I remember biking in a narrow street. A car arrived and followed me but immediately the driver begin to honk. What was I supposed to do? Jump on the sidewalk?

Brazil: People annoy me when they are rude. When they make me miserable. When just his views is correct. When they are careless with my things. When I talk and they don't pay attention.

Korea: I don't like smelling smoke cigarette. So smoking in the street of public places really ticks me off. 

I practiced my French. 

Je suis

Tu es

Il/elle est

Nous sommes

Vous etes

Ils/elles sont

And I sat next to an Italian couple at an outdoor cafe and for a teeny tiny itsy bitsy moment, while they were speaking, I felt like I was in some piazza in Rome. This does not mean I have an imagination. This means I'm delusional. And I REALLY need to get out of town. Is that being greedy? The last two months of my life have been one big vacation! So it's not that I need a break. I just need that high you get from being in an unfamiliar place. I wish I liked drugs. My vices would be WAY cheaper. 

Day 64

Conversational English Level 2. Freelance. Wine shop. More freelance. Then more freelance. Then organic, biodynamic, environmentally friendly Malbec. Daydreaming about far away places AGAIN. Not doing the dishes. Wondering if I should get my hair cut tomorrow. Wondering about a lot of things. Being patient. Being anxious. Being thankful. Considering push-ups. Maybe sit-ups. Looking up flights. Getting off the computer NOW before I do anything drastic.

Day 63

I'm supposed to be writing mission statements but instead I'm planning imaginary vacations here. And here. I have the travel itch. Bad. I need a fix. 

Day 62

For the first time ever, I'm watching American Idol. On purpose. To see Adam Lambert visit our old high school in sunny San Diego. I never knew how much I loved Mt. Carmel High School until I moved my junior year. In San Diego I grew up with every culture. People of every color. Then I moved to Michigan. My new high school had one black kid and a couple Chinese kids. The boys wore khakis and tucked their shirts in. The girls wore ribbons in their hair. Everyone looked the same. So I blame (thank) Mt. Carmel for making me the xenophile I am today. I think I love diversity so much because I got to see what life is like with out it. It's creepy!

I love you Mt. Carmel High School. I will give you lots of money if I ever become rich. That's a huge gigantic enormous IF so don't hold your breath or anything. 

Day 61

Jack of all trades, master of none.

I remember the first time I heard that phrase. I thought, "Hey!! That's me!!" followed immediately by "Oh fuck. That's me..." 

Nothing sums up my previously subconscious approach to work (and life) more than that phrase. For better or worse. Exactly two months after getting laid of from a job I hated, I have 3+ jobs that I love. I love them for a ton of reasons but I think what I love most is the fact that I don't have just one job. I don't wear just one metaphorical hat. Every week I split my time between three very different jobs requiring three very different interests and skills. On the days I work all three jobs, instead of feeling overwhelmed, I feel quite liberated. If I were teaching ESL or slinging grape juice exclusively, I think I'd eventually find myself anxious again. I used to think this anxiousness was the result of not finding the "right" job. Now I know it's BECAUSE I've found the right jobs. Jobsss with an sss. 

I've made peace with the fact that I'll never be really good at anything. I don't have the patience nor desire to concentrate on honing one skill or learning one art. I get bored. I start wondering what else I would be missing out on if I spent all my time at one job. Or in one city. Or with the same people. 

This is bad because I'm also one of those people that enjoy steady paychecks, health insurance and 401k. Paying $500 for health insurance is just stoopid. But I'll figure all that out. For now, I'm running with the jack of all trades thing. It's fun. My new jobs may not have the traditional benefits like vision and dental but I think they are doing worlds for my overall health and well-being. My quality of life has skyrocketed. And money had nothing to do with it. Imagine that. 

Day 60

Watching more Jim Jarmusch. Love Jim Jarmusch. There's an idea here somewhere.

Day 59

One last night with the camels then it's back to work.

Day 58

I was Chaldean all day today. That's kind of like a full time job.

Day 57

And other times I love advertising.

Day 56

I don't believe in 5 year plans but I asked my students (coworkers?) to write about theirs anyway. For will/may/might/would/could practice. Premium responses. Per usual.

France: So I hope that in five years the science will have do great progress. Really great. So I might get gills, like fishes. It would be very useful for me. Now I swim like a dog, but with gils and some other enhancements, I may swim like a dolphin and I could enjoy deep water swimming. I might also get a few more arms, useful to wash dishes. No, really, I think I will enjoy the future.

Day 55

I don't join book clubs. I don't hang out with groups of girls. I don't eat onions in my salad. I do now.

5 femmes with 5 different professions from 5 different countries, age 23-40. Single. Married. With kids. Without. Hanging out in a kitchen. Making a big lunch. Arguing over onions. Not talking about books. And I was actually having fun. I didn't want to leave as soon as I got there.

They reminded me how much I like people. (Sometimes.)

In other news, Germany did not offend anyone in class today. In fact, she and the Brazilian Tiramisu queen have a weekend shopping trip planned. Shopping is the best friendmaker ever.

Brazil: Here I could see that Americans like big boxes, big cans, big cups, big advertisements papers, big cars and so on. I also notice that on the advertisements on the radio, they say the company's phone so many times, in Brazil they only say one time.

Japan: Why are the coffee cups so big?

Korea: Korean homes have underground heating system. So back in the day, most Korean used to sleep on ground in home. It's very warm. You may sleep in ground. You can feel better because when korean people feel hurt, they usually use warm things. For example hot pack, hot stone room and hot food. So you'd better experience that hot culture in Korea.

Japan: I was annoyed by drivers during driving. They blew the horn at once when the lights changed to green.

Germany: In Germany, please not surprised when you go to swim. Many people swim in the nude. I hate the lycra. It is bad for the skin. I like to be nude. Is much better.

Day 54

Je suis learning Français. Je t'aime all the Ss and Zs.

Bonsoir.

Day 53

France. Japan. Germany. Korea x2. Brazil x3. My new English Level 4 class.

It's going to be an interesting 4 weeks. Thanks to Germany. I'm pretty sure she has already insulted Brazil and Korea. Unintentionally. I think? Luckily they don't understand each other very well yet. France is hilarious and the only thing I know about him for sure is that he loves the supermarket (me too! me too!). Korea #1 is thrilled that in America, it is possible to make any type of meal from a box. No cake mix in Korea. No Rice-a-Roni. In America, you can make anything you want whenever you want! Brazil says he's never heard of Oprah. The other Brazil loves Tiramisu. To which Germany replied "Well, I hope you like the gym too.". When asked to practice modals and begin a sentence with "I can't" Germany responded with: But I CAN do everything.

I'm thoroughly amused already. To say the least.

Day 52

Writing. Writing. Writing. All day. All weekend. For my other, other job. The company that makes these purdy little thangs. 

Day 51

Cleaning + My first favorite song ever



+ Some Tempations



+ Some Stevie

Day 50...but wait, there's more!

I had a brilliant idea yesterday when an Argentinian winemaker (the very blue-eyed, very dark-haired Matias) popped in the store to pour his wines himself. I guess it happens every so often. So my new mission is to convince one of these winemakers to let me come work on their vineyard sometime. Like for a week. So I can cross it off my bucket list. And of course just hang out.

Day 50.5

Just got a call from the school. I get to teach the next session of English Level 4! Starting Monday! This means NEW foreigners! And more homework assignments! And no new grammar! And more new friends! And more research for plan B, C, D, X, Y, Z!

!

Day 50

Axing the career in anthropology, STAT. An e-mail I just received from the anthro department at a university after inquiring about their program:

Stephanie,

Having a fascination with other cultures is a sign of an intelligent individual. Certainly there are countless books that you could read to fulfill that interest.

Pursuing anthropology as a profession goes far beyond the dream. For starters, there are virtually no jobs for people with MAs. The main employers were car companies and ad agencies, both of which have been hit hard in this recession.

The PhD program is a 6+ year commitment in an academically-rigorous program, including two years of coursework, comprehensive exams, a year or more of field research, and a 350-page dissertation. A potential grad student generally has a specific idea of what he or she wants to study--for example, one student is studying the effect of a tourist program on a certain remote region of Tibet.

With a doctorate in anthropology, you can teach on the college level, lead research programs, work at an NGO, and so on. But since you would now be applying to programs starting in September 2010, your future profession would start in 2017 (or, more likely, even later). Can you wait that long?

Sorry to be so straightforward, but you need to know the truth. If you still are interested in anthropology, let me know and I can arrange for you to visit with some professors and grad students.

Wishing you the best of luck, Mark

Way to sell the program, Mark! 350-page dissertation. Won't graduate until 2017. Virtually no jobs. This might be one of the funniest e-mails I've ever received. After making me laugh out loud, it did give me a reality check. School is a big commitment. And I've never really been great with commitment. Or decisions. Or niche work. Or homework. Which means on to my other ideas for capitalizing on my cultural interests.

Day 49

Last day of English Level 4. I miss Brazil, Morocco, France, Italy, Spain, Venezuela and Costa Rica already. Today they each prepared a lesson on their native language. We learned greetings in Italian. Vowel pronunciation in Portugese. All of the colors in French. And all of the parts of the face in Spanish. Sonrisa means smile. I thought you should know that. My vocabulary lacks the proper adjectives to describe this experience. I’ve exhausted awesome and amazing. Wonderful? Eh. Marvelous? That’s a mouthful. Magically delicious? Close. I’ve learned a ton. The Present Perfect Tense. The correct pronunciation of Champs-Elysees. The Spanish vowel song. The differences of the regions in Brazil. That I’m even worse at grammar than I thought. That I’m better at teaching than I thought. That I don’t hate people. That I have to find more ways to work with the ones from other cultures. That this is just the beginning. Of what, I’m not sure yet. But I have some ideas…

Day 48

The little things that make my students happy:

France: Above all that, I like to explode the bubbles of the bubble wrap. I remember one day for a wedding where it was rolled out on the floor for the children. Large pieces of bubble wrap with my husband and we were the only adults among a lot of children to dance and jump on the bubble wrap. It's just amazing.

Venezuela: Some people confuse happiness with pleasure, but some pleasures not always can give a real happiness because then after, they left an empty space in the person. That is why I think that for me, the happiness is in those little things that at the same time give you pleasure and you make yourself a good person. And the most difficult happiness that I've got is the one you get in those difficult times, painful times, when you know how to make them real good moments somehow.

Spain: Sometimes the same thing can make me happy or unhappy. I don't know what it depends on. 

The little things that make me happy:

Getting mail. Nothing like a handwritten note, nothing. Skirts. Windows. Conversation. Finding the most perfect gift for someone. Meeting someone as obsessed with Motown as I am. Outdoor markets. Cooking for people. The smell of matches. BBQ. The first day in a new city. Barack Obama. Foreigners. Dark chocolate. Fresh herbs. Old jazz. Thunderstorms. When someone begins a sentence with "I've never told anyone this before". Imperfections. Listening. Seeing people I love laugh really hard. Suntans. Cosby Show marathons. Change. Cobblestone. Watching my mom do an exercise tape (she is super uncoordinated!). Wine and cheese and bread and olives. Taking pictures of things. Unemployment. Unemployment checks. You!

Day 47

It’s 94° in Boston. Which means it’s 194° in my apartment. Which means I packed up my freelance and got the hell out of there. And ordered champagne of course. On an outdoor patio. Under a giant red umbrella. In the middle of Tuesday. Because I can. Wish you were there.

Day 46

It's ESL Book Club y'all. 

Brazil, the brilliant anthropologist who worked for the UN in Paris, and whose husband is a diplomat, wanted extra help outside the classroom to practice her English. And because I just want to talk to her all day about her job (I've never thought about anthropology! Maybe I would love it??), I told her I'd organize something for a few of us in the class.

I picked up this book in college, after I my obsession with other cultures really began to manifest. I loved hearing an Italian's perspective on American life. I enjoy hearing an Italian's take on anything really. 

This will be our first book. We'll meet once a week to discuss it. And maybe discuss my future career in anthropology.

Hey, why not?

My new motto.

Day 45

I am the proud new owner of hot pink shoulders and hot pink cheeks. It's about damn time. I was turning see-through. More green, really. It was gross. I'd rather be hot pink. 

It was also a momentous day at the wine shop. I picked out and sold TWO bottles of wine all by myself. I threw out the ol' oh this is a white but it drinks like a red because homeboy let the skins chill with the grapes a little longer. It's "complex". Sold! Suckers. 

Time for some Active Voice v. Passive Voice. The most unsexy way to top off the first 80 degree weekend of the year, I know. But I'll take grammar on my stoop on a Sunday night over robot Monday mornings at the office any day. Or for now at least. 

Day 44

Already been up for about 3 hours. I have some sort of disease that makes me wake up at ungodly times like 4:17AM. It blows. Always. Except for today. I might have had a good idea while lying in bed wide awake this AM. I'm waiting for Brian to cawl me back and agree. It's 7:30 and that muther is STILL sleeping. So I guess I'll try and take a nap. Wake me up when it turns 83 degrees outside.

Day 43

This is all I have to say:

Day 42

When you don't work from 9-5, you can watch that phony Italian, Giada, in the middle of the day. And learn how to make these. And make them for your friends when they visit. Like tonight.  

Day 41

Pretended to teach English all morning. Put in some freelance hours. Cleaned my bathroom. Woo! Should be working on wine shop brochure but can't focus so I'm getting caught up on my NOTCOT.ORG instead. And feeling jealous afterwards of people smarter and cooler than I am, of course. 

Brilliant.

Why I don't check luggage unless I absolutely must.

Priceless.

Day 40

Today was rainy and windy and awesome. Mostly because it's not snowing, I'm not wearing a coat, and there are flowers outside my window. 

Class in the morning. Borders all afternoon, researching side project #476. I have a lot of side projects these days. They could all fail miserably but they are fun to entertain. And eventually, if I do enough things wrong, I may do something right.  

In other news, my "students" continue to make me smile. And think. 

France: Today, I find inspiration when I look to my husband. He is so quiet and upbeat about life. Sometimes is very annoying. There is no famous person or celebrity who gave me inspiration, just simple people with a great personality.

Italy: I learn from my parents that the family is the most important thing in life. I hope to have 2 or 3 children. The problem to realize my dream is my boyfriend and I hope my future husband. He is a really extrovert boy. He wants explore the world and opens his mind, in fact, he come to Boston to study in the business school even though he doesn't need because his father has a good company. He would like to live in a big city with a big airport because he wants to feel that he can go away when he wants. He is a really crazy guy. I felt in love to my boyfriend, he stimulates me to open my mind because I lived in a city where the people have a closed view. 

Brazil: I don't have one person who inspired me; I have many people who inspired me in different times of my life. When I was child, my very old aunt who always took care of me taught me many important things. She was a very optimist and very happy person. She taught me that in all my life I should try to be a happy person and not expect more from what people are able to give me. All people have many problems and many limitations that we need to respect.

Wow. 

Wow they are smart. And wow, I haven't sat at a desk or rolled my eyes in 40 days. 

Day 39

Got back to town in time to catch the tail end of the Boston Marathon. Here are some people who are better at life than I am.

  

Kinda...

Whatever. I can run 2 miles now. In a row. On a good day.

Day 38

Wedding shower. All day. All weekend. Realized 'wedding planner' is one career profession I won't be dabbling in ever. You have to really not hate people to do that and I don't know if I'm there just yet. 

I think I'd be better at planning elopements. I wonder if there's such thing as an Elopement Planner. I could be one of those. Although maybe planning one defeats the purpose. 

Day 37

Escaped for drinks with friends last night. All of whom work in advertising. All of whom need out. I need to find them a way out. My next new job is to find new jobs for my friends. Fun ones.

But not until I get back to Boston on Monday. I'm beat. The Chaldeans are wearing me out.

Whoa.

Day 36

I read an amazing little article in one of those airplane magazines a few months ago. I've googled my eyeballs out trying to find it again. No dice. Even called Northwest and had them send me the magazine. Wasn't in there! It vanished! But I can't get it out of my head. I want it to be in your head too (especially you Gino!).

It was about some dude living in NY, some 20 years ago. He was feeling restless from work, from just life in general. He's out for a walk one day and just says F it. He hails a cab and heads to JFK with nothing but the clothes on his back, $6000 in the bank and a credit card. He goes to the ticket counter, asks what flights are available. Puts the next flight to Paris on his amex. Gets to Paris. The taxi driver asks him where he's headed. The only hotel he can think of in Paris is The Ritz. It's $2000 a night. So he books 3 nights. For the next 3 days he just walks around the city, visits as many museums and galleries as he can, calls it a day. It was one of the best times he's ever had in his life etc etc you get the idea.

If my bank account is suddenly depleted one day, it will be because of this g damn article and this jackass. An article that could very well have been some marketing ploy by Northwest Airlines (see how cynical advertising has made me!) preying on starry-eyed suckers like me. But I don't care. It worked.

This guy, imaginary or not, is my hero. I've been known to leave on the same day an idea pops in my head. But Paris? The Ritz? No clothes? I'm sold.

Day 35

I took today off to hang out with the Chaldeans. In Michigan. I've only been home for a couple of hours and I'm already in a food coma. 

Didn't tell the extended family I got laid off yet. Because I don't want to hear it. I don't feel like hearing 8000 people tell me I should just move back home. And that I shouldn't have moved in the first place. And I can't imagine how I'd tell them moving back is never going to happen without offending them. And their lifestyles. And their priorities. 

I went away to school. I moved out of my parents house right after. I'm 27 and STILL not married. This wouldn't be the first time I let them down. So maybe I'll just tell them. 

Day 34

Getting laid off was probably the highlight of my career. It was like graduating from college again. My career was like yo, you’ve spent 5 years learning how to think and write but most importantly, think. So here’s a couple Gs. Now get out there and have some fun. Do something that makes you talk really fast when you describe it to other people. Something that makes it impossible for you to sit still because new ideas are bouncing around in your head like crazy.

On March 12th, someone else made a decision for me that I was too chicken to make. I wanted out of advertising before I even got into it, I just hadn’t figured out what exactly I wanted to do. I walked out the office that day thinking thank God I don’t have to come back here ever again. Thank God I am in a city I dig. And thank God it’s spring! I was bummed that the trip I had begun to plan for Greece/Turkey would have to be postponed but other than that, I was ready to move on before they even finished with their I’m Sorry Spiel. I felt excited. Like 10% oh shit and 90% HELL YEAH.

Before getting laid off, my stomach would be in knots over stories I heard about people losing their jobs. It was happening to a lot of people close to me and I would get so worried about what they would do next and how they were feeling. Yesterday I found out that 60 (and counting) people were laid off from my old agency in Detroit. Ughhh. Knots again. But this time, not just for the people let go but for the “lucky ones” that weren’t.

No one ever talks about the people stuck in the office once the axes have swung. Forced to do the same or more work with less people, under more pressure than ever, in a gloomy office with paranoid bosses and co-workers who fear that their days are numbered as well. No time to think of a plan B because they’re working overtime trying to hold on to what they have. Nothing to stare at but a mess of empty cubicles where their friends used to be. And when people ask how work is going, they have no choice but to say “Oh, I’m just lucky to have a job”. Or people will think they are ungrateful bastards.

There are two sides to every ax. Now I've been on both. One allowed me to keep a job. One allowed me to keep my sanity.

Day 33

For homework, I asked my students to write about the reasons they chose their careers.

France: As far as I can remember, I’ve never been interested in non-scientific subjects. One of my favorite occupation when I was young was to lock myself into the bathroom and try to create my own lotion. My optimized recipe was a mix of equal volumes of my mother’s beauty cream, my father’s shaving cream, shampoo and a pinch of talc. And as a good scientist “like in the movies” I was testing on myself my new invention (in fact scientists never do that).

Italy: I have chosen to become a nurse because I like very much to help ill people. I think to do a nurse is very difficult because you work with people and you don’t work with things. If you work with people, you can’t do wrong because you can do to die a person.

Costa Rica: When I first started, I didn’t really know what I was doing. But as time went by, I started to liked more. So maybe it was a coincidence or destiny. I like learning about and understanding the circle of life and how all living things interact. And also an other reason why I like this, or, should say “love this” is because I can try to share the acknowledge.

Spain: I don’t remember why I decided to study advertising. I think it was by chance. Then I started working as a graphic designer, by chance too. Now that I have the opportunity to study again, I think that, by chance, I could find something new and completely different to all the things I did in the past. So now, when I used to read all the courses and programs that people give me, I think studying Ukranian Egg Decorating or Introduction to Bulgarian Crochet is not a bad idea after all.

I am in love with this job. It is too awesome. These people are too awesome. I like them so much that I want to cook for them. They are bringing out my inner old middle eastern lady.

Day 32

Past Participles. I want to punch whoever came up with that term in the teeth. They're just a bunch of verbs that act like adjectives. So why can't you just say that! Why did you have to invent a whole new annoying word! One that my students can't even say! 

Hey Venezuela, what's so hard about it? You just toss a Past Participle into a Present Perfect and bam! All of the sudden you're talking about the past that is also the present. Quit livin' in the Simple Past Venezuela. Get Continuous. Everybody's doing it. 

Oy. Obviously I changed the subject as fast as possible. To more important things like what our favorite restaurants in Boston are. How people dance in Algeria vs. Brazil. How Morocco draws maps and wants to study geology in America. How Spain's life hasn't changed like she thought it would and why she's here learning "English" in America. When Venezuela is going to teach us how to Flamenco. And finally, where we're all having drinks at the end of the course. 

I'd say my class is progressing very well. 

Day 31

So there I was at Cafe Vanille, enjoying my croissant and writing a cover letter for a job I'm not sure I want though would like to learn more about, when some d-bag asks me if I'm writing poetry. No, Mr. Bag, I'm not, I'm writing a cover letter. This conversation went on for far too long but if I've learned anything in the last 4 weeks, it is that opportunities come in many forms—from the places and people you'd least expect. Every conversation matters. If not now, it will later. When I told him the position I was interested in was at Zipcar, he mentioned an article in the Globe today about Boston Bikes, an initiative modeled after Paris' bike sharing program and Zipcar, that promises to transform Boston from the nation's worst city for biking into the nation's best. Once released from conversation jail, I went across the street, picked up the Globe and just finished writing the journalist for advice on how I can get involved. 

So what if I've only ridden a bike twice in the past 15 years. I would if it was accessible and convenient and if we had those bike lane things. And if helmets didn't look like...helmets. 

Today, a possible opportunity came in the shape of a 40-something who gave me his card and said we should have drinks and talk more about my "career". That's a negative pal, but thanks for the tip.

So Boston Bikes. Hey, why not? Another thing I've learned in the past 4 weeks: Sometimes you're exactly what people didn't know they they needed. Sometimes you have to tell them they need you. And if you're lucky, they will agree. My two new jobs are proof. Proof that I got lucky. Proof that it never hurts to try. 

{Roagna Dolcetto d'Alba 2007 is my new best friend. I traded Easter ham for roasted baby eggplant, roasted fennel, crusty bread and herbed goat cheese. And I'd do it again. Luca Roagna is only 2 years older than me and the 4th generation of Roagna to run the successful estate with long roots in Barbaresco. All 4 generations of Roagna have upheld a very classic and traditional style of Italian winemaking. This is a favorite at the wine shop, and only $17!}

Day 30

Today is rainy. Really rainy. Really really really rainy. And that's good for getting a lot of work done. And a lot of movies watched. Freelance. Check. Risky Business. Check. Moonstruck. Check. Still hate Nicholas Cage. Check. Still in my pajamas. Check!

Day 29

Rose. Beaujolais. Barolo. Pino. Some bubbles. No grammar. None. Damn strait was a good friday.

Day 28

I said my new jobs were fun, I never said they were easy. It's one thing to understand when to use "can, may, may be, maybe and must" in my head. It's another thing to stand in front of 8 languages who have all learned bits and pieces of English from various places over the years, and articulate those uses in a clear and concise manner. Wow, I was sooo not clear and concise today. But there are a thousand exceptions to every damn rule. Like a million! 

Mama mia. English is stupid.

My brain was exhausted. My students were a bit confused. I didn't want them to get too frustrated over knowing the exact rules (or realizing I don't know them!) so I ended the class with a pep talk (or some ad copy I would have written had this been assignment been to sell an English course that doesn't really know how to teach English). 

I told my class that Americans go to school for 12+ years to learn grammar and still use "you're" instead of "your". Some of the most brilliant writers don't know how to use a semi-colon. So you don't have to know proper English in order to communicate successfully. In fact trying to understand all of the rules can get in the way. So instead of getting caught up with the examples in the book, think of it as a guide. In this class, we're going to bring in newspapers and magazines. We going to write down our thoughts and our ideas. We're going to read everything out loud. We're going to have great discussions. Not just because your teacher is just as confused as you are when it comes to this crap. Not because she is completely fascinated with your culture and wants to hear all about it. But because reading, listening and speaking as much as possible is the only way you're really going to learn.  

I think they bought it. 

Day 27

Today I was a full-time part-timer. Class in the morning. Wine in the afternoon. Everything is good. Too good. Both of my shiny new jobs are bringing out sides of me that I forgot I had. The more time I spend away from offices, conference rooms, client calls, office gossip and big advertising egos, the more I think there's hope for my black soul. People are even starting to think I'm........nice. Me! Nice! Can you believe it?!

Italy - In America, doing the nails is much cheaper than in Italy, BUT the wax, is that how you say? Wax? Yes the wax is much more expensive! $85 for full leg and bikini (apologizes to the boys in the class). Is too much!! 

Day 26

Yesterday I asked my students (can I call them that even though some of them are older and way smarter than me?) to write about how life in America differs from life in their native country.  Because I just wanted to know.

Italy - In America, people love bacon.

Costa Rica - It is not so easy to make friends in America because even if you meet someone and talk to them, the next time you see them they won't talk to you.

France - In America, the waiters are very nice and happy. They will say 'this is the best', 'this is the most delicious', 'this is great'. In America, everything is wonderful and great!

Poland - America should have better food. In Poland, everything you buy is organic. You don't have to pay extra or go to a special store to buy good food.

Morocco - In Morocco, when we see friends we hug them and kiss them on the cheeks. When I went to kiss my friend in America, he said no way man, people will say we are gay. So I said okay. Now I only shake hands. 

Italy - There is not brunch in Italy but there is brunch in America. I loooove brunch.

France - In France, we don't say 'how are you?' to strangers, we just say 'good morning'. In America, people always say 'how are you?' and I never know how to answer that question because I don't know them. So I just say 'fine'. Sometimes when they ask, they keep walking and don't even wait for an answer.

Italy - Yes I think that is strange also. In Italy we just say 'good morning'. It is particular.

See why I love them already. Seeeee. 

Day 25

Hey, why does "laugh" sound like "laff"? 

I didn't like learning grammar the first time around and I don't like it now. What I do like is sitting in a room full of people who roll their Rs and come from cities I can barely pronounce. That part makes me forget about the explaining 'phrasal verbs' part.

For the next month, Monday through Thursday from 9-noon I'll be attempting to teach Italy, Morocco, France, Costa Rica, Brazil and Poland when to use 'at', when to use 'in' and when to use 'on'. I'm going to get to the bottom of "gh". But mostly I'm just going to make my 7 new students tell me everything about what life is like in the amazing places they come from. 

I'll probably learn more English during this course than they will but I'll try to make it worth their while. I will bring in candy. And I'll make them laff. 

Day 24

It's Sunday. Which means I started my day picking at an almond croissant and sipping on a skim latte at Cafe Vanille. I don't even like lattes but this one's different. It taste like fireplace. 

There's a bakery right on the corner of my street but instead, I walk a mile to Cafe Vanille. Every Sunday. Rain or shine. There's nothing that special about the place itself, but I like the people that come inside. There are always a lot of young families. They walk in. Their kids flip out when they see the shiny cupcakes, tarts, and sugar-coated things. They order. They hang out. They bump into people they know. Then they're out.

Cafe Vanille is my "third place". The wine shop I now work at is a "third place". I'm obsessed with the concept of the third place. I was before I knew it had a name. I don't remember how I found Ray Oldenburg's book, The Good Great Place, but I think about what he said almost every day. 

It is a sign of the times that the three best selling drugs in the country are an ulcer medication, a hypertension drug and a tranquilizer. (p10)

In the absence of an informal public life, Americans are denied those means of relieving stress that serve other cultures so effectively…our urban environment is like an engine that runs hot because it was designed without a cooling system. (p10)

What modern society is losing in its failure to proliferate third places is that easier version of friendship and congeniality that results from casual and informal affiliation. (p65)

Compared to Europeans, we are more concerned with seeking comfort and less concerned with going into the world to seek stimulation. (p44)

The most stopped-up, intellectually constipated, and unhappy men I know are those who work all day and go strait home to eat, watch TV and sleep. (p45)

The Frenchmen’s daily life sits firmly on a tripod consisting of home, place of work, and another setting where friends are engaged during the midday and evening aperitif hours, if not earlier and later. In the United States, the middle classes particularly are attempting a balancing act on bipod consisting of home and work. (p15)

His territory was the coffeehouse, which provided the neutral ground upon which men discovered one another apart from the classes and ranks that had earlier divided them. (p24)

The judgment regarding conversation in our society is usually two-fold; we don’t value it and we’re not good at it. (p27)

We lack the stuff of which conversations are made. In our low estimation of idle talk, we Americans have correctly assessed the worth of much of what we hear. It is witless, trite, self-centered and unreflective. (p28)

Those distant ancestors who hunted and fished in order to sustain life found ample novelty in those pursuits. They confronted hardship but never boredom. Our own work conditions contrast sharply to hunters and gatherers, and we are not strangers to drudgery or boredom. Most work is highly routine and too narrowly focused to bring many of the individual’s talents into play… (p44)

The word idiot comes to us from the ancient Greeks, who equated privacy with stupidity. Idiots were those who only understood their private worlds and failed to comprehend their connection to the encompassing social order. (p71) 

My favorite story in Outliers was the one about some Italian immigrants from Roseto that settled in Pennsylvania in 1882. A physician who studied digestion began to investigate the town when he discovered that virtually no one from Roseto under the age of 65 had heart disease. And this was before the advent of heart medications. 

They conducted thorough medical examinations, took medical histories, went house-to-house and interviewed every person over 21. They discovered no suicide, no alcoholism, no drug addiction and very little crime. People were dying of old age and that was it.

Their first thought was that it was their Old World diets. Nope, they were eating more fat than ever, even using lard instead of olive oil like they did in Italy. They struggled with obesity. Smoked heavily. And no pilates classes. 

It wasn't the land either. Towns close by, also inhabited by immigrants saw significantly higher rates of heart disease. 

"What Wolf began to realize was that the secret of Roseto wasn't diet or exercise or genes or location. It had to be Roseto itself...they looked at how the Rosetans visited one another, stopping to chat in Italian backyards...the Rosetans had created a powerful, protective social structure capable of insulating them from the pressures of the modern world." 

8,974,758 calorie croissants aren't just for clogging arteries. 8,974,758 calorie croissants save lives.

One day I'm going to open a third place. Of some sort. You should stop in. You will like it.

Day 23

Today I called one of my best friends to tell him The News and before I could finish, he told me he quit his job last week for same reasons I'm doing everything I can not to go back to mine. We both talked a mile a minute and he had that same excitement in his voice that I had in mine. 

On Thursday, the Polish woman in my ESL class told me that she was a pharmacist back in Poland and hated her job. She hated going to work every day, so three years ago she quit. She now works at her friends shop. They sell new age-y things. I don't know what that means exactly but her face lit up when she started talking about it and she said she can finally say she loves her job. She came to Boston to visit her sister and met an Italian violin maker. She's here for a two month holiday. 

The woman who owns the wine shop got a biology degree from Yale. Had a big job in San Fran. That she hated. That her parents told her not to quit. So she quit. She was walking down the street, saw that a bakery was hiring, and started baking. Led to a career in the restaurant biz. Led to an informal education in wine. Led to a formal education in viticulture. In Australia. Led to her very own miniature wine mecca in the heart of Boston. Oh yeah and she's 32.

I'm just sayin'.

"I'd rather fail at something I love than succeed at something I hate". -George Burns

He's just sayin', too.

Reading Rainbow

!!!

All he really did was state (and prove) the obvious. But sometimes the obvious is exactly what we need to hear. People, Americans especially, are suckers for those stories of individual success and personal triumph. Bill Gates. Mozart. The Beatles. We like to think they got where they are because of sheer genious. But Gladwell reminds us that success is less about extraordinary talent and more about extraordinary opportunities. It's timing. It's upbringing and cultural influence. It's being lucky enough to be given a chance, smart enough to recognize it, and having the luxury of taking advantage of it.

His message couldn't be more topical. There's this recession, heard of it? It's effecting (or affecting?) each of us in one way or another. It will make some of us better and stronger. Force us to be more creative, tap underutilized skills or learn new ones.  For others, it will be their downfall. And a lot of it has to do with things beyond our control.

Any success I meet pursuing jobs and careers that make me happy will be less about my ambition and skills and more about timing. If there wasn't a recession right now, I wouldn't have been laid off from a job I dreaded every single day. And I might have stayed in a career that left me unfulfilled indefinitely. I also got laid off at a time when I don't have a family to feed. I don't have a mortgage to pay. And I'm young enough to change paths without too much consequence (although I believe it's never too late to change).

I got lucky. I got laid off at the exact right time in my life. I know that under other circumstances, March 12 could have had very different consequences. But because I have perspective, all I can feel right now is lucky.

Day 22

I'm trying all sorts of new things lately. Beets, jobs, arugula salad, blogging, chocolate soy milk, these new kind of squats that burn like hell. And now, allergies! Thanks Boston. To celebrate my sneezefest and the nonstop rain, I worked from home. And it was awesome. Tea and books and ideas from 9-5. A little research. A little writing from my new window office. A lot of Reese's Pieces.

Day 21

Poland, Brazil, Angola, China and me. Sitting around a table. Talking who and whom and whose. Then just talking. The two hours flew by. The students (I'd guess they were in their 30s) went from super shy (except for Brazil) to super hilarious by the end of class. I could have hung out with them all day. And you know me and I don't like hanging out with anybody all day. I had no idea what to expect when I went in this morning but I dug it. A lot. The head of the department asked me if I'd be interested in a month long gig starting Monday. Yes, please!

Just a couple more new careers and I should be making at least a third of what I made at my big girl job. I wonder how long I can drag out this little experiment.

Day 20

Lesson 1: Adjective Clauses. They're all co-dependent and shit. Can't do anything alone. Always trying to modify you. Never satisfied with nice simple sentences, they have to go and make everything complex. Adjective clauses are exhausting.

ex. The girl who got laid off met with headhunters today.

ex. The woman whose book signing I went to bored the bejesus out of me. ✌ bejesus.

ex. I missed The Unemployed Olympics, where everyone's a winner!

Day 19

¡Dios Mio! I'm going to play English teacher on Thursday!

Had an interview this morning and fooled them into thinking I'm one of those people that knows the difference between 'effect' and 'affect'. So much so that at the end of the interview, she asked me if I wanted to substitute teach on Thursday. SI! It's an english as a second language class which means I get hang out with my favorite kind of people. Foreigners! And talk about my least favorite thing. Grammar!

Portugese class paid off.

After the interview, spent the day making pictures of Boston for my photog project till my fingers got too cold. 50 degrees my a$$ Al Roker.

Day 18

I haven't had a full-time job in almost three weeks and it still just feels like a nice long weekend. A busy one. Even without a full-time job I still feel like there aren't enough hours in a day.

Speaking of, I did tons of annoying things today. Like fill out forms and mail things. Call people and wait on hold. Make a little program ad for the wine place in slow motion because I forgot how to use photoshop. Still, all of these things put together were not nearly as annoying as sitting in meetings, listening to people argue about things that don't matter while my boss chews her gum with her mouth open. Like a horse. Like if you gave a horse a giant peanut butter sandwich and just sat there and watched him while he went to town. I don't miss that.

And now, I have to write some resumes for some of my other friends who spend 40+ hours a week in their own openmouthgumchewinghorseyface hell.

Day 17

Two words: bartending class.